3. Isolation and Antisocial Behavior
Once the narcissist has hooked you, they often isolate you from your support system. This is when everything begins to change, both internally and externally. At this stage, victims often adopt some of the narcissist’s antisocial behaviors, antagonizing those around them, usually friends or family who recognize the narcissist’s harmful influence.
The narcissist creates a “Bonnie and Clyde” illusion, fostering an “us against the world” mentality. You may find yourself constantly defending the narcissist and your relationship. The narcissist doesn’t even have to do much to cause drama and division once they’ve made themselves the sole center of your attention.
4. Resentment and Grudges
This isolation breeds resentment, my next point. Narcissists harbor hate and grudges against many people, often for life. They may share falsehoods about others to manipulate you, silencing your feelings and judgment. I remember my ex-partner saying, “Holding a grudge is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.” Of course, he said this to excuse his bad behavior while harboring deep resentment for his alleged enemies. Over time, this turns you into a bitter and resentful person, just as bitter as the narcissist.
5. Triangulation and Jealousy
Once the narcissist has isolated you and claimed you as theirs, they may suddenly invite others into your relationship through triangulation, a sadistic tool in their repertoire. Only the narcissist is allowed to make new friends, as they are aware they have little to offer and fear someone else could take them away. Often, these third parties are unaware they’re being used, but they notice your sudden resentment toward them.
Triangulation also builds the narcissist’s support system of “flying monkeys,” who enable them to play the victim and portray you as unstable when needed. This jealousy fuels insecurity, another trait you may adopt.
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