6. Insecurity and Low Self-Esteem
It’s a misconception that narcissists are full of self-confidence. They famously “fake it till they make it,” but they are far from confident, relying on power and control to stabilize their low self-esteem. When you’re with a narcissist, their constant criticism provokes feelings of inadequacy, self-doubt, and low self-esteem in you, mirroring their struggles. Destroying your confidence doesn’t benefit them; it only hurts both of you.
Narcissists target strong, independent people, but trauma bonding and eroded self-worth make you dependent on their validation, just as they depend on validation from others. You may transition from being self-determined to someone who struggles with decision-making, fearing abandonment, and feeling unable to live independently, despite having been self-sufficient all along.
7. Hypervigilance and Paranoia
The narcissist’s triangulation, shady behavior, and the need to walk on eggshells around them create paranoia and hypervigilance in you. These are traits narcissists know well, as they inherently distrust others. Being in constant fight-or-flight mode changes your brain’s structure, with the amygdala (the reptilian part of the brain) taking over to act on instinct for survival. Over time, narcissists can turn a formerly secure person into an anxious shell of themselves.
It’s not uncommon to suffer from anxiety, depression, or post-traumatic stress as a result. Many people with complex post-traumatic stress (CPTSD) are misdiagnosed with borderline or even narcissistic personality disorder due to overlapping behaviors. However, unlike narcissism, CPTSD is a natural response to trauma, not a personality disorder, and is treatable. While triggered behavior may seem erratic, it lacks the grandiosity and entitlement central to narcissism. Victims are more likely to be people pleasers and givers, while narcissists are takers.
Continue reading on the next page
Sharing Is Caring!
Leave a Comment